Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
