The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
