Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
