And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize