she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Drunk is not a location!
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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