the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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