I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Randomize
