Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
She announced her abortion via fbk
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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