Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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