Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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