So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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