AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
