were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
