the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
honey bunches of taint.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
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