So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I think people are normalizing furries
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
