I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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