Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I'm passing your future prison.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
