omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
