Please, let me fuck your mom
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
