Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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