we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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