I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
