After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Randomize
