We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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