I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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