what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
