Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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