It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
