i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
