He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
