Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
