playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
