Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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