Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
