Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
