who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
