It's Friday. Sex?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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