Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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