its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Someone signed my nipple.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
