PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize