i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
