Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
