I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
