Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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