Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
