i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
