the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
