so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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