Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
