He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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